things not to say to your girlfriend

who are you?
don't leak on me!
well i guess from an objective perspective she is prettier than you
you're very homely
periods are just an urban legend
can i have one of your birth control pills
you do look a bit pregnant

not that i've ever said any of these

They Call me...(or i'd like them to call me)

...The Iron Liver
The man with blood on his hands
Disabled Cain (think about it)
Thankertons Blue Flash
The Maltease Falcon
Die schone Krieg
Shalashashka
6
King of games
bloody thumbs
the boner donor
liquid alcohol
grey eyes
Punch Fist!
Guitar Beer-oh
Lando's revenge
da vinci tongue
Jaeger Master
whos the Jose
Scooby Did
The turner
Lesbians last resort

and how was your christmas?

neither a man of wealth nor taste

My mother-Now remember Robert, don't beleive a girl just because she says she's on the pill
Me-what pill?
My mother-oh christ....

But that was quite a while ago, and i now know that the pill is a type of tax that women have to pay based on the size of their breasts. Winter is here and i am cold. i wear 5 layers to bed and still wake with a shiver. Maybe i should really invest in some thermal under wear, for the fashion police deemed me criminally inane a long time ago.

Ploughing my way through lost, the result of which a new sexy theory has emerged. Metallic objects disrupt the smoke monster from taking corpeal form, hence why evil locke had to get richard to yank that bullet outta past locke, and ALSO why echo's brother couldn't be impersonated (excluding dreams) till echo took the metal cross off him. Also, i suspect the valinzetti equation is far older than you might think...

the futures comin fast, and maybe i should actually start making some plans to meet and greet it, rather than it just barging in unannounced and drinking all my hooch.

also me and musical dave (his other nickname is too harsh for the online world) decided to form a band named THE DEVILS THREEWAY! it doesn't get much more ambiguous than that.