I'd forgotten i'd written this

Breaking the 4th wall

“Hello”
“Hi”
“We’ve met before haven’t we?”
“Well we’re the only two people here, so I think it quite likely”
“Your name is John right?”
“Yes, and yours is Derek”
“Right”
“Right”
“Right?”
“Yes, there is a right. It’s right over there, to the right”
“My right or your right?”
“Mine”
“So the right is actually to the left?”
“I guess so…look can you just turn around so we’re facing the same way. That would be a lot simpler”
“Well why can’t you turn to face me?”
“Because I’m facing the right direction”
“I thought right was over there…or was that left?”
“Right, what I meant to say was I’m facing the correct direction, and if you did too then we would be happily unified in our perspective of direction, time and space”
“Well how do you know you’re facing the correct direction?”
“Look at the wall in front”
“My front or yours?”
“Oh, just look behind you”
“Ok”
“HA!”
“What?”
“Now you ARE facing the right direction”
“Sneaky bastard, I hope there’s a point to all this”
“Now we have the same view of the world, I shall explain this point”
“I hope that’s not innuendo”
“No, now look at the wall in front of you”
“Ok
“It’s different from all the others, isn’t it?
“Well, let me just turn around and see”
“You better not stay turned around”
“OK, OK. I see what you mean”
“Then explain why they are different”
“The other 3 walls are solid, thick and black, while the wall in front seems to be thin, white and almost transparent”
“Which I think, given its uniqueness, should call for it to be called the front”
“Ah, well I guess that makes sense. Kudos to you”
“Why thank you…Derek?”
“…Is that right?”
“No. That’s right over there”
“Ah, fair enough. But wait, if we’re surrounded by four walls, doesn’t that mean we’re trapped?”
“Blast, I hadn’t considered that”
“Maybe our oxygen is running out and we’re about to die. Maybe every breathe we take is just a sad recycling of every breathe we’ve ever given”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have farted then”
“Chances are you’ve only farted the same air that you breathed in anyway, so it’s kind of a moot point”
“Regardless, you’ve invigorated me to form a daring escape plan. I’ll be damned if I’m to spend eternity composing words from my mouth that are given voice by my anus”
“Very poetic”
“Just talking shit really. Now, it seems clear that we must break through one of those walls in order to be free”
“Ok”
“And it seems equally clear that those black walls seem impassable”
“Impenetrable”
“unbreachable”
“Unfathomable”
“Their black voids might stretch forever until they come back on themselves for all we know. The right side might just in fact be the very end of the left”
“Right”
“No left. And I think it safe to assume the same of floor and ceiling”
“What about the back?”
“Well maybe it does stretch to the front as the left and right and top and bottom do, but that’s a risk we’ll just have to take”
“So how do we break this 4th wall?”
“Well, it only seems paper thin. I guess we could just run through”
“That seems rash, we break all our bones”
“More likely to result in a paper cut actually”
“Don’t you hear noise on the other side though? Like teeth chattering or lots of tiny high heels walking across a plastic floor”
“Hmm…26 by the sound of things. Not counting punctuation, numbers and formatting. But fine, if you’re going to be such a coward about it, I’ll go myself and stick my head through so peruse. Or my name isn’t John”
“Isn’t it?”
“Right! Now forwards I go. Chaaaaaaaarge!”



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“STOP RAPING ME WITH YOUR EYES!”



















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“Well, what’s it like out there?”
“…..I don’t want to talk about it. I’d rather sit in here with my own odour as sustenance than risk breaking the 4th wall again”
“Did you notice it just healed up after you pulled your head back in?”
“Good! No more red veined lines assaulting the blue iris mote and breaching the black keep of the pupil!”
“I wonder, does that mean if you break through the 4th wall and stay there, that there is no coming back to this world? That once real there, you would cease to exit here, from now until infinity comes back on itself like the very walls around us?”
“Please. Just don’t. Break. The 4th. Wall