Thursday 3 July 2008

when you got a lot of knifes and forks you gotta cut something

drink when you're happy and partying. drink when you're upset and pissed off. drink with friends, drink with family, drink on your own. most chronically of all, drink because you got nothing better to do. I've spent half my holiday drinking, and the other half hungover. now i'm not being melodramatic and saying i'm an alkey, cause i know a few and their aint no way i could or would want to compete with that, but sitting here feeling crap makes me wonder about the pointlessness of it. i've never been good at moderation, in all things. it goes from one extreme to the other. i'm either unemplyed and poor, or working ridiculous shifts and splashing the cash out for all.

Still in one of those dark lame emo moods that annoy me due to the mismatched ratio between the problem and how i feel about it. the big ones i just breeze past and the small naff ones stay with me for years. little limpits on my bobbing subconcious.

on the plus i cheered up a charity worker by convincing her to rap her spiel to me. yo yo, i work to support those with mental disabillities, givin dem utilities to show dem all its not a futility. rollin in the shity city of glasgow how bout some money bro.

not that i'm trivialising the issue of course. i only do that with my own problems. she then told me about how her own friend had commited suicide recently, and again i could feel my own eyes watering up over the story. Feelings 1 Machismo 0. The only way to even the score is to get jiggy with her now, but part of the whole moody bob thing is shunning physical contact, so i shall have to bide my time.

i said no last week, so ha....and i'm also a fanny. Need to curb the ambigious statements. theres no integrity in hoping a vague remark will be interpreted to your own advantage.

thought of the day-the 2nd hardest and best thing to do is say whats on your mind. the 1st is my dong

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